An Adventure in Volunteering

On top of your many roles as a professional, a mom, a wife, a homemaker, are you also volunteering? In my experience, there is no shortage of opportunities to volunteer. Almost every organization leans on volunteers, whether for a professional organization, a church, a mom’s organization, girl scouts, or my children’s school. At one time or another, I have helped all of them. Some require a light touch, while other volunteer efforts can become another job. Volunteering can be rewarding, but unfortunately, it can sometimes become a burden. Are your volunteer efforts rewarding? Today I will share one of my volunteering experiences that left me overwhelmed and my journey to bring my life back into balance.  

I volunteered at my children’s school for Art Adventure for three years. Art Adventure is sponsored by the Minneapolis Institute of Art (MIA) to introduce children to art their art collection. Art has always been an essential part of my life, and I wanted to foster my love for it in my children.

The Art Adventure program is run entirely by parent volunteers. MIA sets up the framework for the program, and each year it is based on a different theme. Each school that participates must have a designated coordinator to implement the program. It is up to the school’s dedicated coordinators to make it all happen. At our school, the dedicated coordinator develops a series of art projects corresponding to the theme, purchases the materials, organizes the volunteers, and outlines instructions for each volunteer to deliver the art lesson and project.

After my first year volunteering for the Art Adventure program, I learned that the school had two dedicated coordinators, and their children were graduating, which would be their last year to lead the program. I felt it was a good place for my time and talent, I have a love for art and the school had a need, so I volunteered. I met with the outgoing dedicated coordinators, and they explained how they divided up the tasks between art and organization. I knew I would love the art part, which I wanted to do. The coordinators suggested I connect with another mom from my children’s class and find a partner to help. I connected with a couple of moms, and after some discussion, I landed on one that I thought would say yes to the organizational role. As I had thought, she did say yes. Now that I had a partner, I set up a meeting with the outgoing coordinators to discuss the transition.

At the meeting, the outgoing coordinators offered a detailed timeline on all the activities that would need to occur and divided the tasks. In their experience, the clearly defined roles helped them manage the duties within their time, and it ran smoothly. I was overwhelmed by all it entailed, but I was excited to develop the art projects, and I was proud of myself for the clarity I expressed in the role I would take on. A few days later, my partner, who had told me yes, sent an email explaining that it was more than she anticipated and would be too much. She said, “I have learned that when I take on too many things, it affects her ability to be a good mom.” I was back a square one. Week after week, we advertised in the school newsletter for an additional coordinator, but no one volunteered. That year I did much of the work. 

The following year I did find a volunteer to help. It was nice to have someone to collaborate with, but the division of tasks that I had envisioned did not come to light. Again, I ended up doing most everything, not because the volunteer wasn’t willing, but they were busy as well, and when things didn’t happen in the time I thought they should, I offered to pick up the task, and they happily accepted my offer. As the year ended, I reflected on my original partner’s email. She said that it affects her ability to be a good mom when she over commits. I started to reflect on my being a good mom by taking on the coordinator position year after year. The art adventure program is in the fall, one of the busiest times of the year for me at work.
The kids are back at school, adjusting to a new teacher and schedule. They need my attention and understanding. I thought about why I had an interest in the program. Organizing the volunteers and buying the materials took a lot of time, and it was not joyful to me. I like developing art projects and teaching kids in the classroom, but limiting my time; even those activities felt like a chore. I went back to my original intent behind my interest in the program, and that was that I wanted my kids to learn about and enjoy art.

I believe in sticking to my commitments, and I am often misguided to think everything rests on my shoulders. Despite the messages in my head, I decided it was time to send my email to the school principal. I composed several emails before I finally sent my message. At first, I indicated that I could help, but I know myself, and I have a hard time just helping; my tendency to lead gets the best of me, and before you know it, I am doing it all. Instead, I thought of the email from the other mom. Art Adventure was getting in my way of being a good mom, keeping up at work, and just more than I could do to remain healthy. Showing up the best I can for my kids is my number one job, and my role as coordinator was getting in the way of that.

I also needed to separate myself from the responsibility of the program. It was not my responsibility to ensure the program remained at the school. That was the principal’s job. My job is for my kids to know about art and love art, and that was already happening because we did art at home, we attended art camps, and they preferred to learn from me than anyone else; that is where my energy belonged. My email stuck to the facts. I had enjoyed my time leading the Art adventure program, and it was time to turn over, and I would not be able to participate the following year. That is what I did. The principal accepted my email without question and worked to fill the position. I provided an outlined step-by-step guide on the program, and two other individuals stepped up and ran the program. My fears that the program would die did not come about, volunteers signed up, and each classroom learned about art. I got to do what I enjoy most, painting and spending time making art, visiting the museum, and having a joyful time doing it with my two children.

Is there something in your life taking too much of your time? Does it bring you joy? Does it offer value to the people who matter most to you? Take time and write down your various roles, paid and unpaid. They are likely all-important but consider if it is worth your time and talent right now, or is it keeping you from being present for the roles that matter most.